Things were going well :-(

Hi Everyone,

I was hoping to post some good news on my recovery but to no avail. Tonight the out of hours doctor had to call and do a home visit. This means that this little person is now housebound for the rest of the week.

Oh well, this means more time for reading, knitting and whatever else takes my fancy.

I will also be having the pleasure of blood tests being carried out at home. Who knows it could even be a lovely young male doctor!!!

I expected to be tired after the anaesthetic and a little low but each time I have an operation it seems to take longer to get over than the last one. I know I will bounce back I have many times before. This time I have learn to be a patient patient if you know what I mean.

No more going out and about for me right now and it will take me a while to get back on my feet literally.

I just have to wait and see what the tests are going to show and hope that it is not more bad news.

I am keeping my spirits up as much as possible and have certainly not lost my sense of humour.

I just need to take this time out right now to recharge my batteries recover and move forward one step at a time.

Who knows what fantasy land I could end up in and write about.

Best wishes to everyone.

Fee

Recovering

Dear All,

I am recovering at home slowly. This path is going to be slow as I am not allowed to go swimming while I have the dressings on my wounds.

As soon as I am able to I will be hitting the water and have purchased some swimming aids in readiness. These aids will also be useful for when I do my swimming coach training.

I am learning to be a patient patient and I am finding this hard.

Luckily I love knitting and have kept myself occupied with this.

I have to keep myself busy and am doing this in anyway I can.

I have not been allocated with crutches due to the lymphoedema down left arm and side and am managing with my walking poles.

I have a "new toy" which is a picking up gadget to save me struggling.

I am hoping to focus back on my writing soon but at the moment my mind seems to wander and I am struggling to become positive about it all.

It is like I have one person on one shoulder saying "I can do it" and another saying "You can't do that you aren't good enough".

I am having these mental battles with everything I am attempting at present but know I will overcome them in time.

I just have to cope and get over this operation first then I will move on with everything I want to achieve.

I haven't lost sight of my goals and dreams. I am still fighting for these and know one day everything I aim for I will have achieved.

I just have to pick myself up and dust myself down. Like the song "I get knocked down but I get up again".

That is me summed up right now.

Best wishes to everyone

Fee

Mixed Feelings

Well the last few weeks have been really busy for me what with one thing and another.

I am still busy collecting sponsorship money in from the mile sponsored swim I managed to complete on 23rd May.

As for some of the time I have been attending various hospital appointments. Yesterday was no exception but I have good news. I am at last discharged from the eye department at RSH. The staff have been absolutely wonderful and despite the fact I will have small black floaters my eyes have recovered from the surgery I had in March.

Yesterday morning, I had two telephone calls. One was an Occupational Therapist making an appointment to see me next week in preparation for my operation on 25th June. Having confirmed this appointment I then started to prepare for the journey to Shrewsbury.

The second telephone call was the hospital where I am to have my operation. "Can you come in earlier?"
Me dumbfounded not sure how to respond "when and why?"
We have had some cancellations and need to fill the slots and it is Monday 14th June.

Call up to loving and wonderful husband. Does Monday suit you for the operation date?

"Yes, fine with me".
Checking diary frantically "um does it have to be Monday I have an appointment in Sheffield that day".

Oh what the heck get it over and done with the sooner the better.

"Yes the 14th will be fine thank you."

Frantically trying to make mental notes of who to contact about cancelled appointments on Monday.

First let Debenhams know I won't be there by telephone and back this up with an email to let them know I am sitll willing to help with the project.

Second let family know not able to visit this weekend.

Third telephone Occupational Therapy team and let them know things have been brought forward.

The list seemed endless but I got there in the end.

With last night being late night shopping off we set to buy various items I required to go to hospital with. I had been putting this off till nearer the operation date but yesterday's news brought everything forward.

So most things have been purchased and I am slowly calming down having ticked lots of my lists.

I have even managed to fill in the CRB check form I was given to complete last Friday.

So today is now a normal Friday with a visit to the dentist this afternoon. An engineer to visit the washing machine and a load of routine stuff.

All I have left to do is pack my hospital bag. Prepare my Chairman's Challenge if I ever manage to get my head around the challenge and set off to the swimming pool as normal.

It is nice to have normal things to do instead of sitting at home fretting.

I just wish my life was "normal" who knows one day it could be, but would I be the same as I am now. I love life's challenges and what it throws at me, it has made me a stronger person. I understand and can empathise with people a lot more when they are scared or upset. Worrying about the future is normal but to me just getting through each day is a challenge.

One thing I have definitely learned is I love challenges. I am setting myself goals and who knows what the rest of this year will bring.

I hope to return to disabled sports in Stafford soon as this will bring new challenges in itself and I love trying to beat my personal best.

This year is certainly full of surprises some nice some not so nice but I will keep going to beat the blues.

Best wishes to everyone.

Fee