Each day is a struggle for me to access my computer. However, due to the support I give others and the inspiration I gain from opening an email or my blog and finding comments I am spurred on to do this arduous task daily.
If I had a complete dream it would be to live in a bungalow with lovely scenary outside and to have a laptop. Instead I live in a one bedroomed house with stairs leading up to the "junk room" where the computer is situated.
It is here I drag myself up one step at a time to access my lifeline; the computer. Every step is excruciatingly painful but I am determined to overcome this to see what the outside world has to offer me.
A new opportunity presented itself yesterday so I have duly applied and will know the outcome in the near future.
Other times I access the computer to see what my friends are up to or to offer them support.
Knowing there are others out there with worse problems than me makes me more determined to do what I can to help them.
Once I have read my emails and decided what is junk or what is extremely interesting I then decide to write. This can be on my blog, an article, letter or even amending my book (which I am getting frustrated with as I am the biggest critic of all when I look at my writing as it appears never good enough).
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night with an idea it is then I crawl to the computer and write it down. I know if I leave it by the morning most of the thought has disappeared and the meaning of it is lost as I try to retrieve it.
There is no set pattern to my life or come to that my writing. I get an idea and I go with it.
It is rare that I actually write with pen and paper due to the fact my hands are so painful I am unable to do this for prolonged periods of time. Yet strangely enough I can type for hours with my ergonomic keyboard with the wrist rest built in.
Strange how what suits one person does not necessarily suit another.
My husband Steve is amazed at what I can achieve and the sheer determination and will power to succeed.
There are times when I want to give up and give in but on the whole I feel positive and once something is committed to print whether it be typed on the screen or on paper I feel I have achieved what I set out to do for the day.
Best wishes
Fee
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It's the committing it to print that's key isn't it? It makes you feel lighter somehow and able to get on with the next thing on your list of things to do for the day.
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